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Clutter from 2006

by Brooke Abbey

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1.
Gone Fission 01:44
Friends, has life at a cellular scale lost its grand appeal? C C# C Baug Have your peptides lost their pep? Have your proteins begun to anneal? C C# C G Are your amino acids flaccid? Do you suffer from limp RNA? C C# D D# Is your protoplasm an empty chasm of boredom and general decay? If so... C B Bb A Ab G Take heart! For I once suffered even as you suffer now C C# C Baug Yet I stand before you the picture of health, and I can tell you how! C C# C G So if your ribosomes are all sombre, and your nuclear envelope's licked C C# D D# And your organelles have begun to swell, why, listen to my simple trick! C B Bb A Mitosis! D Will cure all your microbial neuroses D G D Mitosis! D There is no need to resort to apoptosis, D A A7 Mitosis! D Just split yourself in two D G Mitosis! D You'll have another you D A D So when your golgi complex goes simple and your pinocytosis runs dry D D# D C# Just head on down to the copy room and let your spindles fly D D# D A Get your DNA to do the splits! Throw a party in your centromere D G D A Oh, meet me down at the telophase pub and I'll buy you a chromatid beer! D G A D Mitosis! D Will cure all your microbial neuroses D G D Mitosis! D There is no need to resort to apoptosis, D A A7 Mitosis! D Just split yourself in two D G Mitosis! D You'll have another you D A D
2.
I arrived at my pharmacy practicum, C Lab jacket pressed, my first day F C No one was at the store, just a note on the door - F G C F We'll be opening late for today. C G C When the pharmacy staff finally arrived, C The prevailing emotion was panic. F C Head office just told us we're losing our jobs - F G C F So welcome aboard the Titanic! C G C And it's full steam ahead to the iceberg, C There's no need to stop our campaign. F C Yes it's full steam ahead to the iceberg, press on! F G C F We'll use it to chill our champagne. C G C We forgot you were coming, C Distracted by labour relations. F C Though we're not really sure what your coursework entails, F G C F You're about to get an education. C G C So take note as we hemorrhage customers, C Wave as they walk out the door. F C Just don't bother the manager, he's hard at work - F G C F At opening up his own store. C G C And it's full steam ahead to the iceberg, C There's no need to stop our campaign. F C Yes it's full steam ahead to the iceberg, press on! F G C F We'll use it to chill our champagne. C G C You may wonder why we don't seem worried, C You may ask why we act so blasé, F C It's because if we stick out this whole sorry mess F G C F At the end we'll get severence pay. C G C So it's B Y O job satisfaction, C And take what amusement you may, F C Go on, eat the narcotics, feed glue to the shredder, F G C F Do the blister packs backwards, write doctors rude letters, F G C F Tell all the customers cheap drugs work better, F G C F Just so you last 'til the last day! C G C For it's full steam ahead to the iceberg, C There's no need to stop our campaign. F C Yes it's full steam ahead to the iceberg, press on! F G C F We'll use it to chill our champagne. C G C
3.
You never were the patient kind Well now you'll get to find out how it ends Our little lives, our deaths, our fates And never have to make amends Well I can tell you I forgive you For the things that went before Beside this last betrayal they all fade away You never told me when you left You had to creep out like a cat You never saw me as I wept But you were never one to think about that And of course you know I miss you But you must have guessed that, dear And I'll miss you now forever At least that's how it looks from here Walking down the empty years While you sleep them off so slow and so remote But I will fade away as well Long before you reach that distant star So let's say I forgave you this one too Let's say I wish you well where you are Let's say I wish you well where you are
4.
Tune Away! 02:03
You've pulled your guitar on out of its case Dm (strum alternately with G) There's a pick in your hand and a look on your face Am Dm Like you're about to sing but we hope you're not Dm For there's one small task which you forgot: Am Dm Tune away! Tune away, boys G Dm Or the song you play will just be noise Am Dm Tune away! We'll wait patiently G Dm 'Til you've got that guitar in the proper key Am A Dm Am Dm Dm Am Dm In school a mark of ninety percent Will earn you an A and a compliment But if you bring twelve strings to the circle, bud Please tune all twelve, or we'll be out for blood Tune away! Tune away, boys Or the song you play will just be noise Tune away! We'll wait patiently 'Till you've got that thing, and I mean every string, in the proper key There's a man in the corner with perfect pitch If you don't have a tuner just watch him twitch His sorry grimace will fade away When you've got that string to a concert A Tune away! Tune away, boys Or the song you play will just be noise Tune away! We'll wait patiently 'Til you've got that guitar in the proper key Tune away! Tune away, boys Or the song you play will just be noise Tune away! We'll wait patiently 'Til you've got that guitar (and that banjo, miss) in the proper key

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released December 31, 2006

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Brooke Abbey Vancouver

Brooke Abbey (formerly Brooke Lunderville) is a banjo-playing pharmacist from Vancouver, BC.

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